George Carlin and the 10 Commandments

December 4, 2009 by philosopherpoet

Here’s the full transcript…Why we don’t need ten commandments!

This (script) is from George Carlin’s HBO show, Complaints and Grievances (2002)

 PhilosopherPoet
;)

Here is my problem with the ten commandments- why exactly are there 10? 

You simply do not need ten. The list of ten commandments was artificially and deliberately inflated to get it up to ten. Here’s what happened: 

About 5,000 years ago a bunch of religious and political hustlers got together to try to figure out how to control people and keep them in line. They knew people were basically stupid and would believe anything they were told, so they announced that God had given them some commandments, up on a mountain, when no one was around.

Well let me ask you this- when they were making this shit up, why did they pick 10? Why not 9 or 11? I’ll tell you why- because 10 sound official. Ten sounds important! Ten is the basis for the decimal system, it’s a decade, it’s a psychologically satisfying number (the top ten, the ten most wanted, the ten best dressed). So having ten commandments was really a marketing decision! It is clearly a bullshit list. It’s a political document artificially inflated to sell better. I will now show you how you can reduce the number of commandments and come up with a list that’s a little more workable and logical. I am going to use the Roman Catholic version because those were the ones I was taught as a little boy.

Let’s start with the first three: 

I AM THE LORD THY GOD THOU SHALT NOT HAVE STRANGE GODS BEFORE ME

THOU SHALT NOT TAKE THE NAME OF THE LORD THY GOD IN VAIN

THOU SHALT KEEP HOLY THE SABBATH

Right off the bat the first three are pure bullshit. Sabbath day? Lord’s name? strange gods? Spooky language! Designed to scare and control primitive people. In no way does superstitious nonsense like this apply to the lives of intelligent civilized humans in the 21st century. So now we’re down to 7. Next:

HONOR THY FATHER AND MOTHER

Obedience, respect for authority. Just another name for controlling people. The truth is that obedience and respect shouldn’t be automatic. They should be earned and based on the parent’s performance. Some parents deserve respect, but most of them don’t, period. You’re down to six.

Now in the interest of logic, something religion is very uncomfortable with, we’re going to jump around the list a little bit.

THOU SHALT NOT STEAL

THOU SHALT NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS

Stealing and lying. Well actually, these two both prohibit the same kind of behavior- dishonesty. So you don’t really need two you combine them and call the commandment “thou shalt not be dishonest”. And suddenly you’re down to 5.

And as long as we’re combining I have two others that belong together:

THOU SHALT NOT COMMIT ADULTRY

THOU SHALT NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR’S WIFE

Once again, these two prohibit the same type of behavior. In this case it is marital infidelity. The difference is- coveting takes place in the mind. But I don’t think you should outlaw fantasizing about someone else’s wife because what is a guy gonna think about when he’s waxing his carrot? But, marital infidelity is a good idea so we’re gonna keep this one and call it “thou shalt not be unfaithful”. And suddenly we’re down to four.

But when you think about it, honesty and infidelity are really part of the same overall value so, in truth, you could combine the two honesty commandments with the two fidelity commandments and give them simpler language, positive language instead of negative language and call the whole thing “thou shalt always be honest and faithful” and we’re down to 3.

THOU SHALT NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR”S GOODS

This one is just plain fuckin’ stupid. Coveting your neighbor’s goods is what keeps the economy going! Your neighbor gets a vibrator that plays “o come o ye faithful”, and you want one too! Coveting creates jobs, so leave it alone. You throw out coveting and you’re down to 2 now- the big honesty and fidelity commandment and the one we haven’t talked about yet:

THOU SHALT NOT KILL

Murder. But when you think about it, religion has never really had a big problem with murder. More people have been killed in the name of god than for any other reason. All you have to do is look at Northern Ireland, Cashmire, the Inquisition, the Crusades, and the World Trade Center to see how seriously the religious folks take thou shalt not kill. The more devout they are, the more they see murder as being negotiable. It depends on who’s doin the killin’ and who’s gettin’ killed. So, with all of this in mind, I give you my revised list of the two commandments:

Thou shalt always be honest and faithful to the provider of thy nookie.

&

Thou shalt try real hard not to kill anyone, unless of course they pray to a different invisible man than you.

Two is all you need; Moses could have carried them down the hill in his fuckin’ pocket. I wouldn’t mind those folks in Alabama posting them on the courthouse wall, as long as they provided one additional commandment:

Thou shalt keep thy religion to thyself.

The Life of Raymond Carver (according to Stephen King)

November 24, 2009 by philosopherpoet

Here’s something I came across while browsing through my updates, a very good article by Stephen King.

Link: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/22/books/review/King-t.html?_r=1&nl=books&emc=booksupdateema1

Enjoy ;)

PhilosopherPoet

Raymond Carver’s Life and Stories

By Stephen King

Illustration by Ruth Gwily, based on a photograph by Bob Adelman/Corbis

 

Raymond Carver, surely the most influential writer of American short stories in the second half of the 20th century, makes an early appearance in Carol Sklenicka’s exhaustive and sometimes exhausting biography as a 3- or 4-year-old on a leash. “Well, of course I had to keep him on a leash,” his mother, Ella Carver, said much later — and seemingly without irony.

Mrs. Carver might have had the right idea. Like the perplexed lower-middle-class juicers who populate his stories, Carver never seemed to know where he was or why he was there. I was constantly reminded of a passage in Peter Straub’s “Ghost Story”: “The man just drove, distracted by this endless soap opera of America’s bottom dogs.”

Born in Oregon in 1938, Carver soon moved with his family to Yakima, Wash. In 1956, the Car­vers relocated to Chester, Calif. A year later, Carver and a couple of friends were carousing in Mexico. After that the moves accelerated: Paradise, Calif.; Chico, Calif.; Iowa City, Sacramento, Palo Alto, Tel Aviv, San Jose, Santa Cruz, Cupertino, Humboldt County . . . and that takes us up only to 1977, the year Carver took his last drink.

Through most of those early years of restless travel, he dragged his two children and his long-suffering wife, Maryann, the mostly unsung heroine of Sklenicka’s tale, behind him like tin cans tied to the bumper of a jalopy that no car dealer in his right mind would take in trade. It’s no wonder that his friends nicknamed him Running Dog. Or that when his mother took him into downtown Yakima, she kept him on a leash.

As brilliant and talented as he was, Ray Carver was also the destructive, ­everything-in-the-pot kind of drinker who hits bottom, then starts burrowing deeper. Longtime A.A.’s know that drunks like Carver are master practitioners of the geographical cure, refusing to recognize that if you put an out-of-control boozer on a plane in California, an out-of-control boozer is going to get off in Chicago. Or Iowa. Or Mexico.

And until mid-1977, Raymond Carver was out of control. While teaching at the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, he and John Cheever became drinking buddies. “He and I did nothing but drink,” Carver said of the fall semester of 1973. “I don’t think either of us ever took the covers off our typewriters.” Because Cheever had no car, Carver provided transportation on their twice-weekly booze runs. They liked to arrive at the liquor store just as the clerk was unlocking for the day. Cheever noted in his journal that Carver was “a very kind man.” He was also an irresponsible boozehound who habitually ran out on the check in restaurants, even though he must have known it was the waitress who had to pay the bill for such dine-and-dash customers. His wife, after all, often waited tables to support him.

It was Maryann Burk Carver who won the bread in those early years while Ray drank, fished, went to school and began writing the stories that a generation of critics and teachers would miscategorize as “minimalism” or “dirty realism.” Writing talent often runs on its own clean circuit (as the Library of America’s “Raymond Carver: Collected Stories” attests), but writers whose works shine with insight and mystery are often prosaic monsters at home.

Maryann Burk met the love of her life — or her nemesis; Carver appears to have been both — in 1955, while working the counter of a Spudnut Shop in Union Gap, Wash. She was 14. When she and Carver married in 1957, she was two months shy of her 17th birthday and pregnant. Before turning 18, she discovered she was pregnant again. For the next quarter-century she supported Ray as a cocktail waitress, a restaurant hostess, an encyclopedia saleswoman and a teacher. Early in the marriage she packed fruit for two weeks in order to buy him his first typewriter.

She was beautiful; he was hulking, possessive and sometimes violent. In Car­ver’s view, his own infidelities did not excuse hers. After Maryann indulged in “a tipsy flirtation” at a dinner party in 1975 — by which time Carver’s alcoholism had reached the full-blown stage — he hit her upside the head with a wine bottle, severing an artery near her ear and almost killing her. “He needed ‘an illusion of freedom,’ ” Sklenicka writes, “but could not bear the thought of her with another man.” It is one of the few points in her admirable biography where Sklenicka shows real sympathy for the woman who supported Carver and seems to have never stopped loving him.

Although Sklenicka exhibits something like awe for Carver the writer, and clearly understands the warping influence alcohol had on his life, she is almost nonjudgmental when it comes to Carver the nasty drunk and ungrateful (not to mention sometimes dangerous) husband. She quotes the novelist Diane Smith (“Letters From Yellowstone”) as saying, “That was a bad generation of men,” and pretty much leaves it at that. When she quotes Maryann calling herself a “literary Cinderella, living in exile for the good of Car­ver’s career,” the first Mrs. Carver comes across as just another whining ex-wife rather than as the stalwart she undoubtedly was. Ray and Maryann were married for 25 years, and it was during those years that Carver wrote the bulk of his work. His time with the poet Tess Gallagher, the only other significant woman in his life, was less than half that.

Nevertheless, it was Gallagher who reaped the personal benefits of Carver’s sobriety (he took his last drink a year before they fell in love) and the financial ones as well. During the divorce proceedings, Maryann’s lawyer said — this both haunts me and to some degree taints my enjoyment of Carver’s stories — that without a decent court settlement, Maryann Burk Carver’s post-divorce life would be “like a bag of doorknobs that wouldn’t open any doors.”

Maryann’s response was, “Ray says he’ll send money every month, and I believe him.” Carver carried through on that promise, although not without a good deal of grousing. But when he died in 1988, the woman who had provided his financial foundation discovered that she had been cut out of sharing the continuing financial rewards of Carver’s popular short-story collections. Carver’s savings alone totaled almost $215,000 at the time of his death; Maryann got about $10,000. Carver’s mother got even less: at age 78, she was living in public housing in Sacramento and eking out a living as a “grandmother aide” in an elementary school. Sklenicka doesn’t call this shabby treatment, but I am happy to do it for her.

It’s as a chronicle of Carver’s growth as a writer that Sklenicka’s book is invaluable, particularly after his career path crossed that of the editor Gordon Lish, the self-styled “Captain Fiction.” Any readers who doubt Lish’s baleful influence on the stories in “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” are apt to think differently after reading Sklenicka’s eye-opening account of this difficult and ultimately poisonous relationship. Those still not convinced can read the corresponding stories in “Beginners,” now available in the sublimely portable and long-overdue “Raymond Carver: Collected Stories.”

In 1972, Lish changed the title of Car­ver’s second Esquire story — which he edited heavily — from “Are These Actual Miles?” (interesting and mysterious) to “What Is It?” (boring). When Carver, wild to be published in a major slick, decided to accept the changes, Maryann accused him “of being a whore, of selling out to the establishment.” John Gardner had once told Carver that line-editing was not negotiable. Carver may have accepted that — most writers willing to submit to the editing process do — but Lish’s changes were wide and deep. Car­ver argued that “a major magazine publication was worth the compromise.” Lish, who tried unsuccessfully to edit Leonard Gardner (who would go on to write “Fat City”) with a similarly heavy hand, got his way with Carver. It was a harbinger.

Was Gordon Lish a good editor? Undoubtedly. Curtis Johnson, a textbook editor who introduced Lish to Carver, claims that Lish had “infallible taste in fiction.” But, as Maryann feared, he was — in Ray Carver’s case, at least — much better at discovery than development. And with Carver, he got what he wanted. Perhaps he sensed an essential weakness at Carver’s core (“people-pleasing” is what recovering alcoholics call it). Perhaps it was the strangely elitist view he seems to have held of Carver’s writing, branding the characters “grossly inept” and speaking of “their blatant illiteracies, of which Carver himself was unaware.” This did not stop him from taking credit for Car­ver’s success; Lish is said to have bragged that Car­ver was “his creature,” and what appears on the back jacket of “Will You Please Be Quiet, Please?”(1976), Car­ver’s first book of stories, is not Raymond Car­ver’s photograph but Gordon Lish’s name.

Sklenicka’s account of the changes in Carver’s third book of stories, “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” (1981), is meticulous and heartbreaking. There were, she says, three versions: A, B and C. Version A was the manuscript Car­ver submitted. It was titled “So Much Water So Close to Home.” B was the manuscript Lish initially sent back. He changed the name of the story “Beginners” to “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love,” and that became the new title of the book. Although Carver was disturbed by this, he nonetheless signed a binding (and unagented) contract in 1980. Soon after, Version C — the version most readers know — arrived on Carver’s desk. The differences between B and C “astounded” him. “He had urged Lish to take a pencil to the stories,” Skle­nicka writes. “He had not expected . . . a meat cleaver.” Unsure of himself, Carver was only three years into sobriety after two decades of heavy drinking; his correspondence with Lish over the wholesale changes to his work alternated between groveling (“you are a wonder, a genius”) and outright begging for a return to Version B. It did no good. According to Tess Gallagher, Lish refused by telephone to restore the earlier version, and if Carver understood nothing else, he understood that Lish held the “power of publication access.”

This Hobson’s choice is the beating heart of “Raymond Carver: A Writer’s Life.” Any writer might wonder what he’d do in such a case. Certainly I did; in 1973, when my first novel was accepted for publication, I was in similar straits: young, endlessly drunk, trying to support a wife and two children, writing at night, hoping for a break. The break came, but until reading Sklenicka’s book, I thought it was the $2,500 advance Doubleday paid for “Carrie.” Now I realize it may have been not winding up with Gordon Lish as my editor.

One needs only to scan the stories in “Beginners” and the ones in “What We Talk About” to see the most obvious change: the prose in “Beginners” consists of dense blocks of narration broken up by bursts of dialogue; in “What We Talk About,” there is so much white space that some of the stories (“After the Denim,” for instance) look almost like chapters in a James Patterson novel. In many cases, the man who didn’t allow editors to change his own work gutted Carver’s, and on this subject Sklenicka voices an indignation she is either unwilling or unable to muster on Maryann’s behalf, calling Lish’s editing of Carver “a usurpation.” He imposed his own style on Carver’s stories, and the so-called minimalism with which Carver is credited was actually Lish’s deal. “Gordon . . . came to think that he knew everything,” Curtis Johnson says. “It became pernicious.”

Sklenicka analyzes many of the ­changes, but the wise reader will turn to the “Collected Stories” and see them for him- or herself. Two of the most dismaying examples are “If It Please You” (“After the Denim” in “What We Talk About”) and “A Small, Good Thing” (“The Bath” in “What We Talk About”).

In “If It Please You,” James and Edith Packer, a getting-on-in-years couple, arrive at the local bingo hall to discover their regular places have been taken by a young hippie couple. Worse, James observes the young man cheating (although he doesn’t win; his girlfriend does). During the course of the evening, Edith whispers to her husband that she’s “spotting.” Later, back at home, she tells him the bleeding is serious, and she’ll have to go to the doctor the following day. In bed, James struggles to pray (a survival skill both James and his creator acquired in daily A.A. meetings), first hesitantly, then “beginning to mutter words aloud and to pray in earnest. . . . He prayed for Edith, that she would be all right.” The prayers don’t bring relief until he adds the hippie couple to his meditations, casting aside his former bitter feelings. The story ends on a note of hard-won hope: “ ‘If it please you,’ he said in the new prayers for all of them, the living and the dead.” In the Lish-edited version, there are no prayers and hence no epiphany — only a worried and resentful husband who wants to tell the irritating hippies what happens “after the denim,” after the games. It’s a total rewrite, and it’s a cheat.

The contrast between “The Bath” (Lish-edited) and “A Small, Good Thing” (Ray Carver unplugged) is even less palatable. On her son’s birthday, Scotty’s mother orders a birthday cake that will never be eaten. The boy is struck by a car on his way home from school and winds up in a coma. In both stories, the baker makes dunning calls to the mother and her husband while their son lies near death in the hospital. Lish’s baker is a sinister figure, symbolic of death’s inevitability. We last hear from him on the phone, still wanting to be paid. In Carver’s version, the couple — who are actually characters instead of shadows — go to see the baker, who apologizes for his unintended cruelty when he understands the situation. He gives the bereaved parents coffee and hot rolls. The three of them take this communion together and talk until morning. “Eating is a small, good thing in a time like this,” the baker says. This version has a satisfying symmetry that the stripped-down Lish version lacks, but it has something more important: it has heart.

“Lish was able . . . to make a snowman out of a snowdrift” is what Sklenicka says about his version of Carver’s stories, but that’s not much of a metaphor. She does better when talking about Lish’s changes to a passage in “They’re Not Your Husband” (in “Will You Please Be Quiet, Please?”), pointing out that the Lish version is “meaner, coarser and somewhat diminishing to both characters.” Carver himself says it best. When the narrator of “The Fling” finally faces up to the fact that he has no love or comfort to give his father, he says of himself, “I was all smooth surface with nothing inside except emptiness.” Ultimately, that’s what is wrong with the Ray Carver stories as Lish presented them to the world, and what makes both the Sklenicka biography and the “Collected Stories” such a welcome and necessary corrective.

Stephen King’s latest novel is “Under the Dome.”

Myfacespacebook.com

November 16, 2009 by philosopherpoet

Here’s a great comment on contemporary culture, and what we should really be considering. Every now and again I dose my self with some anti-establishment literature to soothe my soul.

This is just kick-ass nihilism! ;)

PhilosopherPoet

Poet: Andrew C.
Source: Myfacespacebook.com

Welcome to my-face-space-book, dot com

It’s a social network created by so-called experts

The finest in brainwash scientists teamed up

A collaboration in emancipating humanity from itself

Green bucks, vanity in a nutshell

Just to feel the built in wallets in their butt’s swell

Sometimes it makes my gut delve

But the thought stops it’s lingering

When I start fingering my keyboard

This is better than an MTV brand sea-shore

Full of three-hundred and thirty-three whores

times two

I can chat while getting my favorite corporation’s logo tattooed

on my-face-space

The book fell of the ledge in to the flaming pit

How does literature cooked taste?

How’s for a survey to find the answer?

Dan from Montana thinks it tastes like wal-mart cancer

Which, by the way, tastes delicious

Or so I’m told by Ex-Sex-Pistols bassist, Sid Vicious

But isn’t he dead?

Of course, but his name-sake was bought  by Macky-Fred 

Or was it Freddy-Mac, Goldman and Sachs? 

My-face feels like it just got taxed for it’s space

My face feels like it was attacked by a burning copy of The Grapes of Wrath

My, my… how it feels to be faceless

Lipless, tongue-less equals tasteless

Everything I held dear is make-shift

My-face-space-book, dot calm

Mind state;

raped and left for dead on the front lawn

Comfort for the Creature?

November 13, 2009 by philosopherpoet

I’m going to talk about Apple and its comforts. Being a geek for a while now, you first-off worry about your comforts before you boast about RAM to your mates. Well, if you disagree then let’s put it this way…I’d rather have an average machine that I can sit at for hours and get very little wrist strain, than have a Beast that can fly itself to Mars. This product fails to make me feel like I’m relaxing in an armchair. I know that most men want a fancy engine, but at the end of the day, it’s about the car’s seat you put your behind into (or keyboard you rest your fingers on…)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Does Apple match up to this ergonomic standard of mine? I don’t think so. They’re too obsessed with having a smaller piece of technology to brag about. In their defense, they’re not nearly as big as Microsoft was (pre-iPod days), and so they can’t possibly start persuading other companies to ‘make a better keyboard than us’. Why? Well, because then they’d be going against their OWN branding of keeping the product elitist, company specific, slightly expensive, and damn uncomfortable.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Let me grace you with the wonderfully white and sexy keyboard. It’s been prematurely chiseled from a chunk of hard plastic and steel, and I’m sure it’s damn-near hard to break. This is because I’m used-to my keyboard at home that I punch like gorilla into. (Okay it isn’t an ‘apple’ product, although it’s still lasted me a good three years and counting.) Now if you’ve bothered to try out an apple keyboard for anything longer than a few days…so you’ll start to notice the horizontal bruises on your wrists. This is because…although the keyboard looks amazing, the wrist support is as gentle as telling a woman in high-heels to run a marathon. Now don’t let this chase you away ladies! If you’re in love with the graphics an apple can churn out, you could always spend the extra money on buying non-apple peripherals for about half the price. They’ll last you the same amount of time. (The only reason that the apple keyboard may last you a shorter amount of time is because apple – given its history – would’ve brought out a new keyboard with a retinal scanner, and you have to buy or die!)

Apple (for the most part) is very hard to break physically, and electronically. Unless you’re an over curious technician, or someone who suffers from the occasion keyboard rage…it should suit you fine. Allow me to continue down the path of destruction…and onto the mouse!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The old apple mouse (with the big ‘down click’) was a nuisance. I don’t like the peripherals because they are mostly white. Yup, you heard right. So the slight shade of grey that may be lurking on your finger today will be proudly imprinted on the mouse tomorrow. This isn’t the best of things to brag about to the mates, I’m just simply looking at the facts a salesman won’t always see (or tell) you. Let’s look at the positives, well there aren’t many. That little rolling ball at the top might’ve seen small and convenient, although when you think of it…most of your finger slime sticks to it, and ends up causing scrolling problems. Looking at the wrist side of things, it’s equally awful since there’s no ‘natural arc’ for your hand to follow. A proudly-Microsoft mouse (even in its early days) could feel a lot more warm and cozy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The new apple mouse (dubbed ‘the mighty mouse’) is overly sexy. Apple went the other extreme and decided to shrink it down. The new mouse has a more ‘natural’ curve for your hand to follow (provided you have Down’s syndrome or a petite girlfriend to use it for you). Remember smaller technology may be faster, but it’s often hard to clean, hard to find, and nearly impossible to repair by yourself. If you give me something slightly slower I’ll grit my teeth (while I wait for the RAM to catch up) but also feel mentally at ease when it decides to break. Most people I know will call five family members to come help them before the technician arrives to solve the problem.

Most of the ‘new’ mouse’s brilliance is targeted at the fact that there is no wheel on it. Yup you heard me, zero, zippo, zilch, nada. Although does this make it hugely better? Well it’s impressive to all the hardware developers out there, although practically speaking, not at all. The reason is because in a few months (with this being a ‘family’ machine) you’ll have a trail of brown finger-marks on its back. The reason we came up with the wheel (was to keep all your scrolling and dirt in one place). Now I’m talking about the traditional Microsoft wheel that was on a single axis, and continues to rotate in only two directions.

Don’t forget it’s wireless! I’m afraid this means you don’t have to worry about the distance of it from the screen. Is this better? Unless you want to look like a thirteen year old Chinese boy, I don’t think it makes a helluva difference. Apple comes out with larger screens, although the resolution doesn’t change (this would adversely affect the graphics if it did). This means even if you have a 30 inch whopper, you’ll still be squinting to read the subtitles of a movie, or the title of your pdf file.

To finish off with the most important man question…


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Do the nuts and bolts make a difference? Do the internal organs outperform Windows? I’ll disagree with this aswell. Even though I spend my days as a salesman at an Apple store, I’ll disagree. It’s true that you don’t need to upgrade an Apple as often. It’s also true that they are fitted with the latest hardware at the time of making it. However, your apple will only last you about two years longer (compared to a windows machine that has had little upgrading done). Although you may be buying a bit of time financially, you will still have to bite the bullet in the long term and buy the poor bugger a whole new brain. So this isn’t a creature of comfort (if you want to be loyal to apple).

Be prepared for a more technical edition in the future :D

PhilosopherPoet

Predictions from the Past

November 4, 2009 by philosopherpoet

Here’s some interesting quotes i came across on the web. Feel free to to leave a comment if I’ve misquoted someone ;)

 

PhilosopherPoet

Source: http://www.fiction.net/tidbits/religion/predictions.html

“Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons.”

Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949

 

“I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.”

Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943

 

“I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won’t last out the year.”

The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957

 

“But what … is it good for?”

Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip.

 

“There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.”

Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

mp_greatestgadget_f 

“This ‘telephone’ has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us.”

Western Union internal memo, 1876.

 

“The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would payfor a message sent to nobody in particular?”

David Sarnoff’s associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s.

 

“The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a ‘C,’ the idea must be feasible.”

A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith’s paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.

 

“Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?”

H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.

 

“I’m just glad it’ll be Clark Gable who’s falling on his face and not Gary Cooper.”

Gary Cooper on his decision not to take the leading role in “Gone With The Wind.”

 

“A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make.”

Response to Debbi Fields’ idea of starting Mrs. Fields’ Cookies.

 

“We don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.”

Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962.

 

“Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible.”

Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.

 

“If I had thought about it, I wouldn’t have done the experiment. The literature was full of examples that said you can’t do this.”

Spencer Silver on the work that led to the unique adhesives for 3-M “Post-It” Notepads.

 

“So we went to Atari and said, ‘Hey, we’ve got this amazing thing, even built with some of your parts, and what do you think about funding us? Or we’ll give it to you. We just want to do it. Pay our salary, we’ll come work for you.’ And they said, ‘No.’ So then we went to Hewlett-Packard, and they said, ‘Hey, we don’t need you. You haven’t got through college yet.’”

Apple Computer Inc. founder Steve Jobs on attempts to get Atari and H-P interested in his and Steve Wozniak’s personal computer.

 

“Professor Goddard does not know the relation between action and reaction and the need to have something better than a vacuum against which to react. He seems to lack the basic knowledge ladled out daily in high schools.”

1921 New York Times editorial about Robert Goddard’s revolutionary rocket work.

 

“You want to have consistent and uniform muscle development across all of your muscles? It can’t be done. It’s just a fact of life. You just have to accept inconsistent muscle development as an unalterable condition of weight training.”

Response to Arthur Jones, who solved the “unsolvable” problem by inventing Nautilus.

 

“Drill for oil? You mean drill into the ground to try and find oil? You’re crazy.”

Drillers who Edwin L. Drake tried to enlist to his project to drill for oil in 1859.

images%5CExplosivesTestingSiteUpper 

“The bomb will never go off. I speak as an expert in explosives.”

Admiral William Leahy, US Atomic Bomb Project.

 

“This fellow Charles Lindbergh will never make it. He’s doomed.”

Harry Guggenheim, millionaire aviation enthusiast.

 

“Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau.”

Irving Fisher, Professor of Economics, Yale University, 1929.

 

airplane 

 ”Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value.”

Marechal Ferdinand Foch, Professor of Strategy, Ecole Superieure de Guerre.

 

“Man will never reach the moon regardless of all future scientific advances.”

Dr. Lee De Forest, inventor of the vacuum tube and father of television.

 

“Everything that can be invented has been invented.”

Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899.

 

pasteur

“Louis Pasteur’s theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.”

Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872

 

“The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the instrusion of the wise and humane surgeon.”

Sir John Eric Ericksen, British surgeon, appointed Surgeon-Extraordinary to Queen Victoria, 1873

Bury your taboo, before it finds you

November 2, 2009 by philosopherpoet

I’ve got a morbid fascination for all of the darker human behaviors in life. I call it morbid, because most of the time your dinner conversation can’t be about the most brutal murder you’ve ever heard about. You see we’re taught (in Western culture) to be polite as much as possible even if it goes towards the point of being a little fake. Rather be more polite and honest, and this is what leads up to the road of most treacherous religions. Bury the social taboo, and then maybe people will find you more believable. Seal those dead bodies in a heavy layer of rituals, prayers, social events (and if you’re especially lucky) a book that tells you what’s the right way to do things, just in case you have your OWN ideas.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Back to the bodies, before I’m ranting on about religion again. I was watching a program on women killers. Again…here’s something we all tend to ignore. Ever since Women’s Rights have seemed to mean something, most of the time we only think of men as strong and sophisticated killers. Some of us are even hesitant to mention that women might have a dark side, because then we’ve become chauvinist (or gender-specific, depending on how politically correct you’re feeling at the time). I came to learn that many killers (male and female, although I was watching a show on so we’ll keep them in the hot seat for the time being) are victims of childhood abuse.

You have to have a sense of brokenness inside of yourself to be able to burn up other children and family members with little remorse. So if you ever decide to study serial killers you’ll pick up that down the line they suffered a period of physical (and often sexual) abuse. Whether it was some uncle who liked to do some molesting on the side; or a husband who liked to get drunk and pummel his wife to pieces. Both stir up a gut reaction in me…because I’m always voting for the underdog. What I’ve also come to learn about many killers is that the key motives are often power, jealousy, revenge, and greed. I said ‘power’ first because I think that it’s the primary influence to torture someone else’s way of life. You do this normally because you feel jealous about something, and you get a release doing it (which could be seen as greed or revenge.) Relying on more specific results of the case would give us an idea of which is more relevant.

There’s a very strange need in people to crush the tormentors that brought them so much psychological harm. I was a victim of bullying as a child and I even though there have been a few years of therapy between all of it, I still have a very human fantasy of standing over someone who gave me a very raw deal, and watching them squirm. If you do decide to partake this as a hobby, you simple have to consider how much squirming you want the people to do. Let’s not forget to have to weigh up how much the squirming will effects you, and if you want to see more people squirm under your hands. I admit that I’m being a bit vague, but I don’t want to delve into unnecessary psycho babble about death when I don’t need to…

Going back to the power issue, I find it incredible the lengths people go to watch others squirm. I forget the name now, but I remember that there was a woman in Ohio in the early 1920’s that went about poisoning her whole family with arsenic. The criminal profiler that was interviewed mentioned that the killer today might have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder today, but then psychology was hardly available to the general public, since the quacks of the time were still learning new things in psychology and psychiatry.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So we have this housewife who was abused as a child, and then went straight into a abusive relationship with a husband. He obviously took advantage of her mental illness and beat her up, time and time again. After his death, she goes to the pharmacy, and buys arsenic to plant in everyone’s food during a family get together. She manages to kill off one of her relatives, and then make the rest violently sick. After that she takes up a very clever strategy of nursing some of her family back to health, while at the same time, slipping them poison in their food.

Apparently arsenic can either be administered immediately in a large quantity, or be done over time, so that eventually it accumulates in the system and makes the body shutdown. I can’t think how much more fucked in the head you have to be, to sit next to your dying relatives and ensure their death. To my knowledge…she ended up killing off around a dozen of her family members. Eventually she ended up being sent off to a reformatory for women, where apparently she was a great deal happier. I think real life got too complicated for her, and especially with the condition she was in…it made her feel trapped. Being in a prison-type place I think showed her a certain amount of respect that she was looking for. After she was released at the age of 79, she went back to the prison the next day, because she was terrified of the outside world, and what it’d do to her.

It’s a harrowing story, and I’ll be sure to look up the name of this woman, when I get the chance. The point I wanted to make is that most of the time we react in a violent way because we’ve buried ourselves in a taboo (or our own system of lies). It’s often very difficult to wriggle free from it, because you’re sowing your own behavior into yourself. People react when they are challenged by something they haven’t talked about in a while (for a very good reason). So if you want to avoid the urge of killing people make sure you a) have a shrink b) are prepared to think for yourself and to forgive and c) you don’t take yourself seriously as a result.

Otherwise there much just be a bigger body count on CNN sometime soon :D

PhilosopherPoet

Five Things You Should Know About Upgrading From XP to Windows 7

October 27, 2009 by philosopherpoet

Here’s something I found while trawling the web again.

Enjoy… :D

PhilosopherPoet

Source: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/10/23/AR2009102304277.html?wpisrc=newsletter

Tony Bradley, PC World
PC World
Tuesday, October 27, 2009 12:19 AM

Now that Windows 7 is here, the three out of four users who have rejected Windows Vista and clung to the tried and true Windows XP can breathe a sigh of relief and consider moving to the new flagship operating system.

Upgrading or switching operating systems often comes with some trials and tribulations and the Windows 7 upgrade is no exception. Microsoft has tried to provide the tools users need to make the transition as easy as possible, but you may hit some snags. Here are five things you should be aware of as you upgrade from Windows XP to Windows 7.

1. . Unfortunately, Microsoft has not provided Windows 7 with the capability to upgrade directly from Windows XP. The explanation is that so much has changed between Windows XP and Windows 7 within the operating system kernel itself, the Registry, the drivers, etc. that trying to get from Point A to Point B just won’t work. That isn’t as horrible as it sounds. Frankly, although in-place upgrades are convenient, experts always recommend doing a fresh install when moving to a new operating system in order to ensure the best performance and overall experience. Just think of it like Microsoft did you a favor by forcing you to do it the right way. You’re welcome.

2. ?? You can’t get from Windows XP to Windows 7 directly, but there was a little known operating system that came out between the two. I know you have blocked out that part of your memory to avoid horrible Windows Vista flashbacks, but surely you could make the switch to Windows Vista if its only for an hour or two. Windows XP users can work around the upgrade issue if they have a copy of Windows Vista. It doesn’t even have to be licensed since you won’t be activating it and won’t have it loaded for more than a few hours– well within the 30-day trial period. Just upgrade from Windows XP to Windows Vista, then upgrade the Windows Vista system to Windows 7. I make no assurances that this will go off without a hitch. I will add a disclaimer: refer to the first tip where I reminded you that it is recommended that you do the clean install.

3. . If you bought your printer when Clinton was still in office, or your graphics card when Michael Jordan was still ruling the NBA, you might have a hard time finding software updates and drivers to make them work with Windows 7. Thankfully, Microsoft has an app for that. Microsoft created the Windows 7 Upgrade Advisor tool which scans your hardware and software and identifies any known compatibility issues. It provides guidance on how to resolve identified issues, and makes recommendations for what you should do to ensure a satisfying Windows 7 upgrade experience

4. . Whether you do the clean install or some sort of crazy work-around to upgrade from Windows XP to Windows 7, arguably the most important part is making you’re your data and personal preferences stay intact. That’s where the Windows 7 Easy Transfer tool comes in. The actual file is You can find it on the Windows 7 DVD under First you run it on your existing Windows XP system to migrate your user profile(s) to some external storage. Then, after Windows 7 is installed you run it again to import the user profile(s) to Windows 7. One small caveat. If you have 32-bit Windows XP and you are taking the opportunity while upgrading to make the switch to 64-bit Windows 7 you might run into some problems. I was unable to transfer user settings from a 32-bit to a 64-bit system using this tool during a previous upgrade.

5. . If you’re running Windows XP I assume you have invested in some security software– antivirus, antispyware, personal firewall, etc. Because of changes that Microsoft has made to protect the operating system kernel, those Windows XP-era security programs will most likely not work in Windows 7. The good news is that the Windows 7 firewall is significantly better than the Windows XP firewall, and Microsoft provides adequate security protection for free with Windows Defender and the recently released Microsoft Security Essentials antivirus program. You may still want to explore alternatives and install more robust protection, but these tools should provide sufficient protection for the time being without costing you any money.

If you don’t want to spend all that time alone, maybe you could throw one of the Windows 7 parties and you and all of your Windows XP friends can have ice cream and cake (or pizza and beer) while you make the transition.

Of course, you might better off to simply invest the extra money and get a whole new system with Windows 7 already installed. If you have held on to your computer hardware as long as you held onto the Windows XP operating system then you are really skewing Moore’s Law and its time you upgrade.

Free Fall

October 9, 2009 by philosopherpoet

Free Fall

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The Age of the iPod

October 3, 2009 by philosopherpoet

Nowadays we’re living with a huge amount of noise. This is a very loose way of saying that we’re bombarded with technology, and let’s not forget the advertising and subcultures that go with it. It’s hard and confusing, but if you can master the technology of today, then you and I are open to endless possibilities.

Ever since the iPod and various other media devices became a norm, people have been obsessed with music and now anyone from a teenager to a middle aged father is listening to music. It’s a great thing to know that you can carry your whole cd wallet in a little pouch that is lighter than your actual wallet where more crucial information is stored. But also your wallet has become a little less relevant to how you want to feel about life. Your wallet has now become a product of the noise of our generation.

Balancing noise and narcissism

A while ago I was talking to a Doctor at my work. He told he doesn’t like technology at ALL. He told me that it’s made us removed from the world and with what’s going on. Although he’s not entirely correct, I’m forced to wonder how much of what he’s saying is actually true. One tragedy about an iPod is that it can cause us to introvert. One out of every ten customers I deal with, I don’t approach and ask them for help since they’re glued to the music on their belt, and simply want to waft in and out of the shop, in their music and their own thoughts. It gets on my nerves because I’m unsure if they want help, or they want to just be left alone instead.

I also understand them, because I’m a natural-born metal head and some days I enjoy the idea of simply plugging into a great album and forgetting about everything else for a while. So is this Noise (in the positive sense of the word) or blind Narcissism that’s provoking us?

It’s both to be honest. I don’t see life as an ultimatum, because that would be cruel and unfair to my own morals. The Greek legend of Narcissus is still a powerful one, so here is the story:

[Narcissus] in Greek mythology, the son of the river god Cephissus and the nymph Leiriope; he was distinguished for his beauty. His mother was told that he would have a long life, provided he never looked upon his own features. His rejection, however, of the love of the nymph Echo or of his lover Ameinias drew upon him the vengeance of the gods. He fell in love with his own reflection in the waters of a spring and pined away (or killed himself); the flower that bears his name sprang up where he died. According to another source, Narcissus, to console himself for the death of his beloved twin sister, his exact counterpart, sat gazing into the spring to recall her features.

The story may have derived from the ancient Greek superstition that it was unlucky or even fatal to see one’s own reflection. In psychiatry and especially psychoanalysis, the term narcissism denotes an excessive degree of self-esteem or self-involvement, a condition that is usually a form of emotional immaturity.

- Narcissus. (2009). Encyclopædia Britannica. Ultimate Reference Suite. Chicago: Encyclopædia Britannica.

In short we have a man who is forced into a period of water-gazing because of external factors in the environment. Our fallen hero has now become blinded by what he sees. In my opinion you could replace the harmless bowl of water, with an iPod, for our generation. It would seem absurd to argue that an iPod could actually kill someone. I won’t even make that statement for fear of living with the consequences and court cases. It is a strong example of how too much of a good thing could be detrimental to what we are unaware of.

An iPod at best can make us look antisocial, angry, happy, relaxed, meditative and internally engaged with ourselves. How then can we listen to music without breaking social barriers? My advice is to keep your life (and what you listen to) to two big containers.

The Two containers

The first is labeled ‘Online’ and the other ‘Offline’. These terms can be translated as Public and Private Life. Although society may try and merge these two categories, I think that is important we keep them (for the most part) separate.

So when you are at home, or in your car, or any other private space, that would be a good time to listen to your iPod. Although if you are in any kind of public place I would suggest that you whip it out of your ears, and engage with your external environment. This may seem like a massive shock to an introvert who is terrified of talking to people, although I still think it’s important. The only small exception I’ll add to this list is if you use an iPod for exercise. So if you are running down the road or going to the gym with an iPod plugged into your head, you should keep it there so you can continue pumping iron and jogging. If you don’t (when you’re in a public space) and you keep listening to a song of yours, it may seem fine, but you would be missing out on an opportunity to talk to your external environment.

Next you get the internet which is an equally vital part of our culture. So should we allow ourselves to become Offline with regards to the internet? Well, I’m afraid that the ball is in your court on this one. With software like Facebook and MySpace, we feel a great deal safer to be open about what we think and feel. Tread with caution, for once you have stuck your feet into the electronic river of information, is virtually impossible to get away from it.

If you are, like myself, addicted to burrowing into the corners of the internet, then for goodness sake research exactly what you are burrowing into! I have a very active mind, and I’ve always made it a habit of mine to investigate my own behaviors. For example in high school I started listening to heavy metal, much to the horror of my parents, and from then on I decided to read numerous articles on the internet. Some would be album reviews, while others would look at metal as a whole (from its birth with Led Zeppelin and Black Sabbath) right up to the present day (with names like Metallica, Slipknot, Cradle of Filth and Korn) swarming the charts.

On the same topic I’ve read books and articles on the blogging and Facebook so I feel satisfied with what I’m getting into. If in doubt of what to do next, research your subject in question.

The River of Creation and Chaos

The Greek philosopher Heraclitus argued that you cannot step into the same river twice. The reason is that he argued that river is in flux. So try to picture the Greek symbol for infinity which is our numerical symbol for 8, which has been pushed on its side. The river, like the symbol for infinity, is never-ending…hence the word ‘flux’. The river we may swim in may last longer than our existence on earth does. The reason for this is because that’s just the way it is. It’s a form of energy that never stops.

What does the saying mean then? Well, every time you dip your foot into the river, you are in different particles of water, because the river is constantly flowing. You can then argue that we experience the river differently every time we immerse ourselves in it, because some time has passed since when we last dipped our foot in, and at the same token, we may be older people (if even by a few minutes) compared to our initial encounter with the river. Now consider the internet… :-D

In philosophy there are three questions we start off asking ourselves, to stimulate our minds.

- Why are we here?

- Where have we come from?

- Where are we going?

It’s a tough one to consider; now if you ask the internet those same questions (by replacing ‘we’ with ‘you’) then the outcome is equally flabbergasting. The internet is an unknown river to most of us. We will just find one small spot where we enjoy swimming and make use of it! So as an ‘iPod generation’ I think that we should choose to embrace this river that, like it or not, we’re bound to come into contact with.

It may not always be what we’re expecting, but it gives us a sense of peace and solace in a strange way. So even if you haven’t read up on the river you’re dipping into, and are feeling a little nervous about it, just be aware of it, and a little research is always a good idea. ;-)

PhilosopherPoet