I Hate Xmas

This is supposed to be the festive season. Well, it is at the moment since everyone is swept up in a commercial frenzy of gifts and events. But besides that I don’t like Christmas. At the same I do sound like a terrible contradiction, since NOBODY hates Xmas. I’ll say for now that it is the shopping mall experience that gets to me.



(Since I like making lists so much I think this’ll be another one.)

a.       There are tons of buyers. This ranges all the way from the screaming five year old, to the old people standing right in the front of the queue. This means that there is more chance of what YOU want being taken away. The shopping experience itself also becomes hazardous, having that many more people to walk past, and wait for in the queue.

b.      Little kids. Don’t get me wrong in this part, I really do like small kids. Although if have a shopping mall, a kid, and a Xmas season all in one equation, it doesn’t work out. Look everyone likes the idea behind Xmas of being looked after and feeling special, etc. Children aren’t compatible with shopping malls at this time of the month.

c.       Shops have promotions. Kids are going psycho in the head, cos everthing is near the end of the year, and what the heck they’re going to go crazy whether you’re there or not. They’re surrounded with potential toys, and god help you if you happen to be the one standing in the way of that kid and his favorite action figure!

d.      Kids are unpredictable; they like to be able to do things their own way. Being a shopper means you’ll be the victim of a possessed child and an angry parent. So a useful tip would be AVOID toy shops like the plague.

e.      Be an Adult. This means finding up-market shops that won’t be swarming with half pints. Unfortunately your options are limited here, but ultimately you’re looking for a ‘brain dead’ activity. This could also be a place where a kid yawns and starts to whine (e.g. clothing store), but nevertheless we still have a strategy here.


To Be Continued…

Bad Santa


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